Me: Oh, Chris, I got yelled at when I showed up to that class yesterday.
Chris: Because you forgot the paper?
Me: No, I had that, but I took them in the wrong order.
Chris: Carlos did that, too.
Carlos: Yeah, they wouldn't even let me take it when I did that.
Me: Well, I'm white, so...
Carlos: There is that.
Chris: Wow, second day? We went there?
Carlos: Oh, that's odd? Are we not in America anymore?
My grandma never seemed to have regular syrup in her house (which I learned when I was, like, 27 wasn’t actually maple syrup either, but table syrup, which it turns out is different), so every time we slept over and she made pancakes or waffles or french toast or whatever, we used corn syrup on it.anachronistic-vibrancy cringes every time I look at a bottle of corn syrup because of that story.
why would you ever idolize cops when firefighters exist
yeah seriously have you ever heard of “corrupt firefighter”
what would a ‘corrupt firefighter’ even be. he put out that fire with a little TOO much water. he was a little rough with the cat he rescued from a tree for a little old lady
In my hometown, when I was a kid, a firefighter was arrested because it turned out that he was setting houses on fire, then showing up in uniform to put out the blaze in a heroic manner and getting a ton of praise for it.
But I mean, I’m sure it was just the one guy.
Me: Ooo, there's nutty bars, or swiss cake rolls, or fancy cakes, they're like zebra cakes.
Carol: I don't like zebra cakes, the frosting leaves a weird film in my mouth.
Me: Okay. Star crunch? Oh, oatmeal cream pies! Those are healthy.
Carol: I don't like THEY ARE NOT HEALTHY.
"obama is fuckin up"
"should have voted for the other guy"
No. We should have voted for the other guy you twats. Were all fucking doomed now.
This past election was the first time I felt that sitting out would be better than literally anything else I could’ve done.